hmmm... bored right now... tau tak kasi die gi seh... haha.. joking... papa...u have fun ok??!!! now doing nothing...so that's why i update..haha... he went for a gig... with abg wan... and some other people... some question will remain unanswered... how do i get to be with him for so long.. how did i get to hold his hand?? how did the hugging starts?? how did the tongue get to work out?? how?? how?? and how??? we were expecting only few months...but now... it has been a year and 3 months already.. never have we plan to go this far... never plan to be this good... never thought that this will be so perfect... hmmm...papa...i love u so much.. and i'm sorry that i ask for break once... it's because i felt betrayed... that girl... she was flirting with u and she even message u...call u... when she already know that u're attached... i hate her..!!! she nearly break our future... the one that we've been talking about.. i love when u describe the things that will happen...especially...when u describe how the baby look... she nearly broke the happiness... but papa.. i'm sorry to say this... but i still can't trust u the way it is before.... u need to gain back the trust... i'm just superstitious about u.. i'm afraid that u'll betrayed me again... altho' i dun want it to happen.... hmmmm... i know u have no intention towards what has happened... but it's the influents that i'm afraid.. i'm afraid that u'll 2 time me... hmmm.. i once told u that iwasn't the perfect girl for u...coz i could not take good care of u..i can't be there for u like 24/7... all i want is just to be loved and to be care.. i dun care how others feel.. now, i tried to change that... but every time i tried to, u won't like it.. so i believe u want me to be the same... and i'm glad...coz i want to be love for who i am... i dun want to be love for who i am not... u can hate me for u i am...and not love me for who i am not... it hurts to know about that... i know u love me for who i am... and i'm bless to have u as a guy... i boon to have u... i regret not knowing u much earlier... i love u so much... all the tears i shed... when we fight... i never regret all that... coz evrytime we fight, it's about other people.. it's never about us... we've never fight about the thing we did... we only fight for what people have done to us... all the tears that drops... i makes me feel much better.. for me... those tears are my problem... i don't know how to hide them... i just want to let them go... so that i could have peace in my mind... all those words that i said that hurts u, i'll cry coz i made u sad... ur face will made my day bad went u doesn't smile at me... just by seeing u smile... it's enough to make my day cherish... and those words that u said that hurts me, i'll also cry.. coz the pain..i couldn't bare with it.. i'm too weak... i'm a girl... and everytime i cried, u'll try u're best to make me smile.. u're beg me for forgiveness and tickle me to make me smile.. or even just a silly face of urs...it makes me smile...and laugh to the things u did... thanks for all the love that u shower me with... thanks for all the hugs that keeps me warm when i'm cold.. and does kisses that made me feel secured... and those hand that wipe away my tears... and that time..when someone uses my name to get to know a guy... u went to find out who that person was and called that guy up...to tell him the things... and that girl was using ur girl name... i really appreciate that... that was the first time in my life that someone actually stand up for my right.... those words of encouragement that u gave to make me stop crying... and u saud that everythings gonna be fine... really made me forget about what actually happened... thanks for everything... promise me that u'll never leave me for someone else...???
